The Foot Squeezer
This sinister-sounding contraption featured two spring-loaded panels designed to squeeze and release your feet repeatedly. Supposedly, it improved circulation and lymphatic drainage, reducing swelling and promoting “natural detox.” In reality, it felt like having your toes slammed in a car door repeatedly.
The mechanism often pinched or jammed, especially for larger feet. Some versions even had hand cranks—turning the relaxing idea of a foot massage into a manual torture ritual. It quickly faded from the fitness world, likely because bruised toes aren’t a great advertisement for wellness.
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